4 weeks

Hi everyone.

i am a little over the 4 week mark after my vestibulectomy. I noticed at exactly week 3 i stopped taking my pain meds and i was able to leave the house without realizing i was getting better. I can now say that the burning i had for 4 years is officially gone.

I should be extatic right?

It still hasnt hit me yet, and everyone around me cant understand that. I have to tell my brain that my burning isnt there and i can now do the things i dreaded or couldnt do before (walk to the store, leave the house, etc) it just feels like a huge relief. I even have no more burning when i pee. Yes it someimtes stings because my stitches are still in but today after i peed in the afternoon i literally felt NOTHING and i said HOLY SHIT!

I am going to admit i do feel like i have a black cloud over me. Its due to the fact that someone who was dear to my heart is no longer here...and she helped me for 3 years (my therapist.) She pased several months ago without any warning and i just ask god why i cant just tell her the good news. She helped me day and night through the blood sweat and tears. i miss her so much my heart hurts.

She hugged me after our last session and i thought about it after like ok she never really does..and then i realize its because she knew she would never see me again.

I just wish i could hug her and tell her the good news. She was like a mother to me. She filled a huge hole in my heart and now shes gone.

RIP<3